Mood: Contemplative
Music: Gackt -Oblivious -顔のない天使ー

It's been tough. Ever since I got into JC, I mean.

I'm supposed to be doing maths now. But my brother just told me to go screw myself and so I'm am currently doing so. (not literally. But figuratively, since I have loads to finish by tomorrow.)

I fell asleep last night, while curling up next to my mum and wishing that monday won't come. I mean, I used to be such a happy kid, but nowadays, I just feel like I screwed my life over. She told me stuff about my dad and her...and told me not to be sad if things really didn't take a turn for the better.

I don't know if I can be not sad. I probably won't emo about this. But hell, I'm sure I won't be too normal about it either.

You know, my JC friends are really nice. Sam and Davita bought me this card that said, "Face the problems. Cross out the negatives. Believe the best." and the picture is of this squirrel who is trying to get the apples on the tree, and trying out ladders of different lengths and learning from one failure till one works. They wrote, "Hey! Cheer up okay!! things will get better with us in your life! Lotsa love, sam and davita(: "

So, I don't really feel alone somehow. Just maybe, I don't know if I can be strong enough to get past all my problems.

Currently, I'm listening to Gackt's new song from the "Faraway" single - Oblivious -顔のない天使ー... It makes me feel so calm, yet knowing of the problems that would come and that I have to solve them alone. I've decided that in his own small way, some of his songs really have substance and it doesn't matter whether all of my friends are gackt haters or not; I'm pretty resolved to accept him for his talent.

Speaking of which, my blogskin is still featuring Genesis. I can't never ever get bored of his face. Really.

Hmmm. I think I need a break from everything. Alright. So I'll just slow down a little then...

Back to maths.